Science Says It's Better for Humanity When Men Have to Compete for Women's Attention

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published 20 May 2015

Sperm is all men are really good for, so why hasn't Darwinism carried them off yet? This fact has long baffled biologists, who, before and kind of during this new study, have more or less called the male species' being here "a waste of effort" and "seriously kind of useless."

The British study, published in Nature, found that "sexual selection, in which males compete to be chose by females for reproduction, improves the gene pool and boosts population health, helping explain why males are important," according to Reuters (opens in new tab). When the researchers examined groups of beetles, they concluded that those in which the males had to fight off more of their buddies to mate benefited from fewer genetic mutations and not dying out from inbreeding in 10 generations.

So you can suck it, Grandma. I don't have unrealistically high standards—I'm just looking out for the future of humankind.

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Chelsea Peng is a writer and editor who was formerly the assistant editor at MarieClaire.com. She's also worked for The Strategist and Refinery29, and is a graduate of Northwestern University. On her tombstone, she would like a GIF of herself that's better than the one that already exists on the Internet and a free fro-yo machine. Besides frozen dairy products, she's into pirates, carbs, Balzac, and snacking so hard she has to go lie down.