Holy #%$: 12 Fashion Epiphanies from the Latest Gucci Show

Mamma mia.

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Shift the sequins and bleached eyebrows aside for a bit, and you'd see that Alessandro Michele doesn't muck around when it comes to his juxtapositions. Referencing "Et tu, Brute" toga times but through the lens of disco and the '70s—and with clothes so new they can't be worn until half a year later. Faux ripoffs ("Guccy") against the realest deal (legit Botticellis at the Palazzo Pitti). But back to the bigger picture—here, take a closer look at some of the best looks and accessories from a megawatt show.

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1 This If-Napoleon-Had-Made-It-to-Russia Coat

Nobody gets past the cold and general gloom. But if they did, there'd be lots of grain-based alcohol and probably this tiered topper—with furry bits and a hood and diamanté chevron trim—waiting. Onward, then!

2 The Instrumental Hair Ornaments

According to the brand, that is called a "cithara, one of the most ancient stringed instruments." According to us, that is a really wicked barrette, especially with the ear-obscuring hairdo and the ribbon-wrapped pony. (Who else wants to be highly decorated again?)

3 The Pearl Headdresses

I want to contract this calcium-carbonate-skull disease.

4 This Empress Josephine-in-the-'80s Dress

At the club knocking people out left and right with your shoulders as you bop to Bananarama so hard your tiara bruises your forehead. Worth it. 

5 This Suit That Makes Me Want a Baked Potato

With a side of furry cuffs.

6 This Actual Disco Goddess

The cleverest thing about this is not the allover sparkle (though YESYESYES), but the slight off-ness of the teal tights. While Chanel might have said to take one thing off before you leave the house, Gucci says add seven and make sure they're weird. 

7 These Crystal Co-Ords

Dream travel outfit. 

8 The Floating Hair Pearls!

Like those Velcro-backed crystals you bought at Claire's back in the day but so, so much better. 

9 This Thing

"Death to the fanny pack," they said. "I lived, b*tch." —the fanny pack

10 The Furry Mules (and the "Counterfeit" Shopper)

What's real? What's fake? What's gucci?

11 This Smiling Franken-Bag

Cute but kinda psycho (with the mask decal and the multiple prints and skins). But cute. 

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