Kanye Pens a Poem About McDonald's; No, This Is Not a Joke

The hills fries have eyes.

Ear, Cheek, Sleeve, Jewellery, Forehead, Shoulder, Joint, Chest, Beard, Neck,
(Image credit: Getty )

Where were you when Frank Ocean's Blonde dropped on Saturday? Pregaming? Or already so faded you were chowing down on an egg sandwich with the hash brown tucked into it at McDonald's, coincidentally the subject of a poem Kanye West wrote for the latest issue of Ocean's zine Boys Don't Cry?

Titled "The Mcdonald's Man," the new literary classic personifies fast food items to tell a tale of deception, paranoia, and the rarity of the McRib. (Summary: Potatoes are shifty, but all the other foods want to be them, except maybe the apple pie.)

"McDonald's man/ McDonald's man/ The French fries had a plan/ The French fries had a plan," our next Poet Laureate wrote. "The salad bar and the ketchup made a band/ Cus the french fries had a plan."

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Never forget that this is coming from a dude who once took his Lamborghini Aventador through the drive-thru—as they say, write what you know.

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Chelsea Peng
Chelsea Peng

I'm Chelsea Peng, the assistant editor at MarieClaire.com. On my tombstone, I would like a GIF of me that's better than the one that already exists on the Internet and a free fro-yo machine. Besides frozen dairy products, I'm into pirates, carbs, Balzac, and snacking so hard I have to go lie down.