Um, So, Who Among Us Is Wearing AirPods During Sex?

According to a recent survey, this is a real thing and we need help.

Illustration, Art, Mythology, Fictional character,
(Image credit: Katie Buckleitner)

No matter which side of the divisive music-during-sex debate you stand on, there’s one thing on which everyone should agree: Headphones—no matter how tiny and convenient and Bluetooth-capable they are—should stay on the nightstand during sex. This seems like a reasonable thing. But apparently, according to results from a recent survey conducted by TickPick, an online event ticketing service, 17 percent of AirPod owners admit to leaving their tiny pods in during sex.

Some qualifiers: TickPick did not personally survey every AirPod owner (I would know: I had a pair until last week, when I tragically lost them somewhere downtown). They surveyed more than 1,000 people who “enjoy listening to music and are sexually active” about their music preferences and sex lives. Disturbing AirPod statistic aside, TickPick’s findings dug up a lot of juicy info on which kind of music fans are having the best sex and how music compatibility plays into how often you and your partner do it.

Some more fun findings from the survey:

  • People who love country music say they’re having the most satisfying sex.
  • Nearly 1 in 4 folk music fans have cried during sex.
  • Partners who have similar tastes in music have sex more frequently than partners who have different tastes.
  • Fans of EDM were the most likely to say they have a sexual fetish...
  • ...versus fans of classic rock, who were least likely to say they have a sexual fetish.
  • People who like heavy metal (🤘) were the most likely to consistently use contraception during sex...
  • ...versus country music fans, of which only 49.9 percent say they use contraception (save a horse, ride a cowboy, indeed).

Interesting as they may be, truly none of these survey’s insights hold a stick to the astonishing factoid that more than zero people are keeping AirPods on during sex. I’m trying to think of the logistics of this....Like, do you think people just get wrapped up in passion and simply don’t have time to rip their pods from their earholes? Or is this an intentional choice, like: I can’t have sex without listening to “Old Town Road feat. Billy Ray Cyrus [Remix]” on repeat via BlueTooth wireless technology

Above all else, this is the best testament to AirPods’ ability to stay put during physical activity that I’ve ever seen. If you try this at home, please DM me to let me know how it went.

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